What does the term “gracious words” mean to you? I like the thought of words filled with God’s grace. God inspires us, and as a result, we speak in a way that is reflective of His love.

Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.
~ Proverbs 16:24

This isn’t always easy. When I’m in a situation where I’m surrounded by other tender-hearted people, gracious words are easy to say and accept. But what about when you’re surrounded by people who lie, attack you verbally, put you on the defensive? As an introvert, one issue I’ve had continually in my life is that I can’t just snap back with an answer. I have to think about it. This sometimes means that I stand there stupidly when other people go on and on. You know that person that can think of the perfect response the minute they are at home? That’s me. I get home and think, “Oh, I should have said this.”

When I worked in the business world, I often got “talked over” by people. I just wasn’t good in that kind of setting. I’m a shy and often dorky writer, and even though I’ve learned to deal with my introverted-ness, there is still a part of me that would rather sit in a corner than stand there and hold my ground.

I admire people that can hold their own in a verbal argument, but if I’m with someone that isn’t being reasonable and just shouting, my first reaction is just to say nothing. That’s not always good. But what can you do?

Well, what I do is go home, get mad at myself, and then pray. Usually, I feel better then, and what’s more, I usually know what to do or say next. If that doesn’t happen, I pray again. When I get my answer, I feel like God nudges me in a certain direction, and then I feel more confident what to say or do next. I can so easily picture His words pouring over me, with the “sweetness” that this quote from Proverbs talks about.

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I’ll say it again, I love the Psalms. (And you’re saying, yes, we know that already Cherie! Okay okay…)

So one thing I’ve been thinking about lately is our growth as Christians. My faith has grown as I’ve gotten older. This doesn’t mean I believe more, because I always believed. What I mean is that as I’ve gotten older my relationship with God and understanding his word has deepened.

One of the things I used to struggle with more is doubt. Again, not doubt of God, but of the world. Will this happen for me? Will I get this job? Will this occur? You know, just the everyday things of life that we spend doing and work for. But as I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized that every time I have one of these thoughts, I can pray about it. God doesn’t want us to sit around wondering about things and having doubts about the world. To that end, I think these thoughts from Psalm 94:19 say it perfectly.

When doubts filled my mind, your comfort gave me renewed hope and cheer. (NLT)
Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.

~ Proverbs 3:5-6 (NLT)

The thing I like best about this quote is “do not depend on your own understanding.” I like this because we are so NOT SMART most of the time. Oh, some of us think we’re really smart. But smart in the way that God is? No way. We’re not even close, and He knows this. He gives us numerous ways to learn about his word and understand the things He’s trying to teach us. If there is one thing I could say to my younger self it would be: “When in doubt, look up.”

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No surprise here: the Psalms are my favorite part of the Bible. (Must be that all that beautiful poetry.) So here I am on Christmas Eve and feeling very blessed for my God. I haven’t had an easy life, but He has been with me every step of the way. Sometimes (or more than sometimes) I don’t thank Him enough for this. I get caught up in being happy and don’t come to Him to say I appreciate things. You know? I think I talk to Him more when things are rotten. And that’s not good.

But I understand the importance of this holiday, so much more than just giving presents and enjoying a meal with your family. Here’s a favorite thought of mine from the Psalms.

“Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever.” ~ Psalm 107:1 (NIV)

It’s a simple sentence, and yet it means everything. I appreciate it from the standpoint of a Christian and a writer. Beautiful words indeed!

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Proverbs is a great section of the Bible, and I probably don’t study it enough. But every time I read a piece of it, I find something that inspires or speaks to me. That was the case with this quote.

The name of the LORD is a strong tower; the righteous man runs into it and is safe.
~ Proverbs 18:10 (ESV)

Even though the image evoked here is of a tower of strength, I like to think of God’s strength much like this graphic, where He holds us in the palm of His hand. We might try to find strength in a physical tower here, but it’s nothing compared to the safety of His hand.

When do you find yourself turning to God’s strength the most? The older I get, the more I run to Him, the more I pray, and the more I listen. I was always a follower (thank you Jesus for coming to me at an early age!) but as I’ve gotten older my faith as evolved. I think that’s probably as it should be. When I feel confused, angry, upset, and everything else, I seek His comfort. When I take the time to do that, I always “come out” of it feeling more confident and secure. It’s when I try and make sense of all the hurt in this world on my own, or when I try and respond to someone who is telling lies or behaving poorly, that I don’t respond effectively. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, without God I am nothing but a silly, lost girl. But with Him, my life holds all the possibilities He has for me. There’s no comparison.

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Wondering what’s popular over at About Friendship? Here are the most popular articles in the last month.

• Gift Ideas for Your Best Friend – No surprise here. It’s gift giving season and you all want to get the very best present you can for your buddy. These are my suggestions.

• Quotes About False Friends. – This article has been popular for quite a while, and I think it’s because when we extend our trust and accept someone new into our life, there is the possibility that they will disappoint us. Now, that isn’t to mean we shouldn’t make new friends, because we should. But we should know that sometimes negativity happens, and we’ve just got to deal with it and still move on and still get to know people and forgive their faults. (We’ve got ‘em too.) The popularity of this article tells me that people are simply looking for some healing when they get burned.

• What If You Have No Friends? – Getting more friends in your life is kind of like getting a new job: it’s always easier when you already have something to fall back on. If you don’t have any friends, it’s actually harder to meet new ones. Your current friends can often introduce you to new people. How to get more friends? I share my thoughts on this.

• How to Apologize to a Friend – This has remained a popular article and I’m glad, because apologizing is a lost art. I hear so many people give lame apologizes to each other, and it really doesn’t help heal the argument.

• Making Friends in a New City - Have you ever moved somewhere entirely new where you had to make all new friends? I did, and it was back before social networking. It was rough! I made a lot of new friends at work back then, and also quite a few at the health club. Here are my thoughts on meeting new friends.

• Gift Ideas for Coworkers – Giving gifts can be tricky anyways, and if you’re working with someone you have to be careful you don’t offend.

• Best Friend Quotes- Another list of popular quotes! I like that people are looking for ways to express their appreciation at having a best friend.

• Websites That Help You Meet Friends – Turn an online friendship into a real life version.

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I love the feeling that you get a “do over.” You know? That’s one reason I like the feeling right after a rainfall, or when the spring comes around, or when I wake up each morning. I feel like I get a chance to start again and make things better than before.

Perhaps that’s why I adore this quote from 2 Corinthians so much.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. ~2 Corinthians 5:17

A new creation.

I was so young when I came to Christ, that I’ve never really knew my life without Him, but I love hearing about people who are “born again” and who feel so differently about their lives. I like hearing about this feeling that their life is totally different, and totally new.

I think one of the really great things about God is that you can feel this way all the time. If you’ve got a burden, guilt, shame… whatever… you bring it to God and ask Him to lift it from you. When He does, your life feels “new” again. This is one of the best gifts about being a follower of Christ, I think.

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Did you know November 15th was “I Love to Write Day”? I was going to mention this on my writing blog, and totally forgot, probably because while I do indeed love writing I also have been really busy with writing lately!

But still, I couldn’t let a day like “I Love to Write Day” pass without acknowledging it. I mean, someone created a day just so we could celebrate it. Right?

Writers have to love it because let’s face it, running a freelance business or getting published can be tough work. I know you guys love it, but let’s share why we do. Here are reasons I enjoy writing:

• It’s helped me live healthier. I’m able to go at a different pace, and since I’ve had a few health problems over the years, it is a blessing to work from home.
• I learn about the world through writing.
• Writing makes me mentally stronger.
• I feel my writing talent is God-given, and for this I am so grateful.
• I love being able to help people by sharing my own personal experience.
• I enjoy creating stories that get people to think differently about the world.
• I like to write things that entertain people.
• I like to let people know that they aren’t alone in a certain problem or in troubled areas of their life.

What about you? Do you love writing? If you do, leave a comment about why.

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A few people have mentioned that they’d like to do a special post today in honor of 11/11/11. I’m all for that! Since this is the month we’re usually thankful for things, here are eleven of mine. (BTW, I’m writing these very quickly, so I’m sure I’ll finish and then wish I had added something…. but here we go anyhow (in no particular order except probably the first couple…)

1. God.
   Oh, I know, everyone thanks God. But you know what? Without him I wouldn’t be here today. He came to me as a young child and helped pull me out of the abusive behavior of my parents and the bad choices I made myself. I wasn’t always listening, but He was always there. He has led me to a beautiful life, and I am very grateful.
2. My Husband.
   You knew that was coming next, didn’t you? I am very thankful for our life together.
3. My True Friends, Including Family Who Really Care For Me.
   It’s a bit sad when you need to specify family, but let’s face it, not everyone treats you the same. There are a few people who really love me and care for me, and they know who they are because I tell them how thankful I am for them.
4. The Written Word.
   I’ve always been drawn to words, and as a kid used to write out poetry and short stories that I would illustrate. Those words helped me deal with so much at a young age, and my love of writing and literature has continued.
5. Being Able to Write for a Living.
   It sounds dorky, but I do get up everyday and thank God for the ability to do what I love everyday. There are so many writers I hear say they wouldn’t want to “have to write everyday,” and I don’t get that. It’s a blessing, and I’m happy for it.
6. Creative Pursuits.
   Besides writing, I’m thankful for my painting and crafting. My aunt always encourages me to “use my creative gifts” even if it’s just doing them on a weekend for enjoyment. There is something very carefree about losing all track of time and just being creative for hours.
7. Poetry.
   Is “poetry” the same as the written word (#4) above? Maybe. But to me, poetry has a special place in my heart. It has helped me get through so much, it has helped me forgive and understand the world a little better. It deserves it’s own spot on this list!
8. Freedom.
   Not just the freedom I have here in the States, but the freedom I have in knowing I am a child of God.
9. Writers Who Are Generous of Spirit.
   Again, sad that I need to separate “writers” from writers who actually lend their time and encouragement, but that’s life I guess. Some writers I’ve met are so full of themselves they make me shake my head. (Do they really believe their press?) And then there are the rest of them that totally make up for them. I’ve learned a lot from the good ones.
10. Football.
    I know, football seems out of place on this list, but if you knew how much I loved it you’d agree with me! I’ve been a Packer fan my whole life, have had the opportunity to write about football professionally, have met many players, and really enjoy the strategy of it all.
11. Readers!
    Here’s a secret: I get little notes and comments from readers who enjoy (or don’t enjoy sometimes) my books and blogs, and I am thankful for them all. First of all, without them I would be talking to myself. Second, when I get a note from someone that relates to what I’m writing about and is moved by it in some way, I am so incredibly thankful!

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It’s Halloween time already, and I’m still wondering where August went. I think that means I am officially like my grandmother, who perpetually wondered where the summer had gone well into the following spring.

I’ve got a few new articles up about Halloween and friendship, so if you’re looking for party ideas or just ways to meet a new pal, check these out.

• Halloween Party Ideas for New Friends. This list of ideas is especially good for new friends. It has some thoughts on getting to know new people and also enjoying the fun of Halloween.
• Volunteering at Halloween. A great way to meet new people is by volunteering, and at Halloween there are several ways to do that that aren’t really offered the rest of the year.
• Setting Boundaries. Sometimes you need to set boundaries in a friendship so you both can remain comfortable. Here are some thoughts on that.
• Finding Friends When You Are Lonely. Loneliness is a terrible thing. I think we all experience it from time to time, but some of us remain in that dark place and it actually makes it more difficult to meet friends that way.
• Letter Writing and Friendship. You know me, I love the written word, and if it’s written by hand? Even better.
• Making Friends at Work. The office is a really good place to make friends. You might not think that, but there are a lot of opportunities not just with your immediate coworkers, but with other acquaintances.

Image: sxc.hu

I’m a big fan of Emily Dicksinson’s poetry, and this happens to be one of my favorites. There is something very sweet and sad about the poem, and then there’s the amazing meter that makes you think that she might be lonely but she’s trying to make the best of it. I know we all have interpretations about poetry, and that happens to be mine! LOL

Here’s the poem in case you’re not familiar with it.

I’m nobody! Who are you? Are you nobody, too?
Then there’s a pair of us — don’t tell!
They’d banish us, you know.
How dreary to be somebody!
How public, like a frog To tell your name the livelong day To an admiring bog!

~ Emily Dickinson

Image: sxc.hu